Something that has been on my mind as of late; relationships, school, the future.
Honestly, I can say that I don’t know what to do with my life. It’s already been 4 years of university and I still don’t know what I want to be. I can’t relate to those who have it all figured out since high school. My two majors are psychology and philosophy. Sounds awesome, but when I start to reflect on my life using what I’ve learnt through these two fields, I can’t help but wonder if I’m depressed or having an existential crisis. I did have some level of fun during those lectures, but as I got further into my degree I realized, I was not happy. At first, I thought it was all the stress and competition that got to me, but when I really think about it, I did not like my majors at all. I don’t even know why I decided to choose them in the first place. Well, actually it was along the lines of “this is cool” and “this is my calling”. Little did I know I would soon regret wasting all that time and money on something that I lost passion in. Or perhaps there weren’t any in the beginning?
Relationships. This is gonna take more than a single post so I’ll just skip it for now. Long story short, there are too many uncertainties in my life at the moment and it would be wise not to jump into dating for the mean time.
I don’t know.
I feel like there are so many things that I still need to figure out before making a plan. I know for sure that I can’t spend another year in school because it has broken me. I don’t want to continue studying, while I lack the motivation. If I were to go back to school now, I know I would not be happy and that will have a negative impact on my grades. I am not adding to my student debt again.
For now, I’m just trying to relax while I still can.
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